Decision to be made

it is another new day on this planet. i don't know why i'm still in the united states, but i am.

there are too many things on my head now. too many decisions to make and too many questions to ask. this is a point in my life where a decision will make a very big difference in my future.

like what i told most of my friends and [some who eventually became my personnal psychologists], that 3/4 of me really hope to go back home and 1/4 of me wish to remain here.

will i be able to handle singapore if i go back? i'm not the same girl who left singapore for the states nearly four years ago. the one big reason that i hope to go back is i miss the days that i spent with my family == HOMESICK and also the sessions that i have with my friends == FRIENDSICK. clifton asks me one question the other day --- what is more important to you? earning good money or relationship? this is a no-brainer question for me. YES. money is important to a certain degree but i do not base my life on that. in this world, nothing beats family ties and friendships.

when you are helpless and alone, money can't help you. when you are sick and about to die, money can't cure you. i think when you are about to die, the things that will be on your mind are memories that you have with your family or friends.

okay. so up to here. you guys might be thinking.. hey isn't it obvious as to which path she should take? oh well, my answer is kind of. i'm a person who pretty much knows what i want. BUT... then sometime, life is not about me and me alone.

if i do get a job, i can gain some experiences over here and this would be very helpful for me if i were to go back home. THINK LONG TERM. another main thing is that my dad really wishes me to stay here. he always says the life in singapore is crazy. well, or should i say that there is nothing call life in singapore.

argh!!